A: When you take it in for a dead battery, and they go ahead and wash it, "just because."
So, yeah. The cold snap apparently killed the battery, through some magic beyond my understanding. Taken care of, not under warranty (naturally.) But not a bank-buster, just another brick in that financial wall.
Bebe, who was particularly naughty today, has been spirited away to school.
Tonight, book club.
Rest of the week, and the weekend, in fact, awash in a sea of confusion.